Wrangler Mama’s Top 5 Snarky Sewing Tips

1. How to sew knits if you don’t have a serger: Buy a serger. Then sew all the knits you want.
2. If you’ve been told the maximum stretch of knit fabric always goes from selvedge to selvedge, it is NOT TRUE. It IS true maybe 95% of the time, but always double check. And then double check again.
3. Yes, you do need to prewash that fabric, you lazy butt. Unless you like being surprised that your pajama pants are now floods.
4. Be careful where you put your scissors. On the edge of a table that is vibrating from machine usage? Bad idea. (Not that I know this from personal experience, but Fiskars will not replace your dressmaker shears if they are damaged in a fall like this. Or so I’ve heard.) Putting them down onto a pile of partially made garments whilst closing them at the same time because you are trying to set them down far from the edge of the table? Also a bad idea. Just hypothetically speaking, of course…
5. If your machine keeps malfunctioning and you can’t figure out why there are broken stitches, skipped stitches, broken needles, snagged fabric, or other such issues, RETHREAD THE MACHINE. ESPECIALLY if you think you already have the tensions, stitch settings, etc set right. This applies to standard sewing machines AND sergers. “But I hate threading my serger!” you say. TOO BAD. Do it anyway. 50% of the time, this fixes the problem. If you are really unskilled at threading your machine, the percentage will be higher. If you find that this does not fix the problem, consult your owner’s manual and make sure you are threading it properly. I found out I was doing something wrong after having my serger for TWO YEARS. Sometimes it mattered, and sometimes it didn’t. But now it’s always done right and I am able to use more functions of the machine successfully.

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Thanks a lot, DJ Lance

My 2-year-old Kangaroo is quite possibly the sweetest, happiest child I’ve ever met–with two exceptions:
1) She refuses to say “thank you.”
2) She refuses to say “I love you.”
There was one occasion a few weeks ago where I did get her to say “love you” to me at bed time, twice in a row. But that’s it.
Until we were in the shower just a couple days ago. She started whining, and I said, “Here, play with Gabba,” and I handed her some Yo Gabba Gabba bath toys. She grabbed a stump with eyes and said, very clearly, “Gabba! I love you!”
To a stump. With eyes.
The end.

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